www.incontinentsupport.org

My initial post was asking for suggestions about a disposable diaper that wicks well. I, as well, use cloth diapers at night which works great. I prefer disposables during the day. Maybe I'm asking for suggestions for a product that doesn't exist.

Thanks Padded,

I was thinking test 1 would be a cotton layer between my layer. I am doing the pul pants over everything already.

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Thank you kindly,
CG

dp66:
Generally speaking diapers with a lot of SAP (Super Absorbing Polymer) tend to wick less than diapers without much SAP. This is because the SAP absorbs and locks up liquid quickly and doesn't allow it to move/wick very much. Most of the premium diapers have a lot of SAP and therefore don't wick very well, but they do hold a lot and don't press-out which are both good things. A good example of this is the Better Dry diapers which have a huge capacity but bulge when wet to such a degree that I feel self-conscious. Some of the lower priced diapers have a lot less SAP but can have issues with total capacity and press-out leaks even though they wick fairly well.

OK so to answer your question directly, one lower priced diaper that I like to use that does wick well is the McKesson Ultra. It's not a premium diaper by any means, it doesn't even have leak guards, but it does wick well, has a nice wide crotch, good leg elastics, good velcro tabs, and holds a fair amount. Good enough for one or two of my relatively small (250mL) voids.

I have been using the face cloth/cloth booster in a disposable trick all weekend and yesterday. Very good results i think. I don't think i even came close to having a leak, which is great. One less thing to worry about. As described the cloth did a good job of evenly distributing everything. The SAP in the disposable then helped keep the cloth from being overly soaked. That seems like a pretty decent system, and I will be adopting this approach to at least my night time routine for now. This would allow me to use a less expensive, (lesser quality) disposable and rely more on the cloth for the leak protection. Not having to worry about my poor wife sleeping too close to me is a great improvement too!

Ellyn: I think you wrote the post a couple years that was your "how-to definitive guide to cloth diapering." Super well written! I read a lot of that chat, trying to learn about this stuff, and got a ton of information. Pretty much went from absolutely no knowledge, to knowing what i would need to order, size, and what should work the best. One of those tips i found particularly helpful was on the Leakmaster pants which you mentioned would fit higher up on the waist. That is a problem area for me at night typically.

So anyway, thanks for the good advice guys. I will have to continue to see how this works for me. I am not opposed to using more cloth while at home. Definitely at night. I imagine I will continue to mix and match and find best practice for me.

_________________
Thank you kindly,
CG

CityGardener:
FYI... I use Walmart "Mainstays Flour Sack Towels" as my cotton booster pads. They are actually just a 28" x 29" thin 100% cotton cloth that I fold into a 12 layer, 14" long pad. They are easy to rinse out in the sink and since they are so thin when unfolded they dry quickly when hung up. They are very inexpensive too, only $8 for 10. These work especially well when traveling since you can simply dispose of them with your diaper in the morning if you can't rinse and dry them.

Also, just a hint on the LeakMaster PUL pants. Get at least one size larger than the size chart indicates. It's not that the size chart is off, but a larger than needed size will give you additional coverage, both above the waist and down the legs, and might be a bit more comfortable to wear. Yes they will be a bit "baggy" but you're looking for performance and comfort, not style. I got this tip from JDinVirginia and found it to be right on.

This sums it up well for me. Being stylish seems like it's behind me. If I think about that idea too long it actually sort of bothers me. I have slimmer cut jeans I cannot wear because there'd be an all too obvious bulge. Kinda makes me sad, and wierds me out thinking about how different things are now than they were just a year ago for me. I feel like a different person. It's uncomfortable. Unfamiliar. I don't even recognize the sensations in my own body. Discombobulated. Wow, I'm ranting.... sorry there's a rainy day outside, I must be moody.

I really do appreciate all the tips. These are little quality of life improvements. Stopping leaks at night is a win. Might not be a cure, but I'm doing something to fight back, so I should be happy about that. Yep.

_________________
Thank you kindly,
CG

I can relate to the clothing issue. I have been having some bad days where I just stay home. Truth is that I don't really have pants that will cover anything more than the Abena pul-ups I am using. I too have some nice clothing. (Three sets of Para pants that are super comfy but show everything) I wish I could bring myself not to care enough to just wear what I want to be I am not emotionally ready to have a big sign on my back.

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Life is like a camera
Focus of what is important
Capture the good times
Develop from the negatives
Take another shot!

... I'm glad you said this. I'm right there with ya. I'm glad folks on here encourage me to get over it. I know I will at some point. Right now though: it's a new phase of life that has not been easy. I'm getting there I think my perspective has gotten a bit better. Big thing for me is just trying to be nice to myself, and stop getting angry at my body. I'm my own caregiver, so maybe I should be more caring.

I also have become a bit of a hermit, with the exception of work, and short shopping trips. Home is a safe place, but I should probably start getting out of my comfort zone and get back into things again.

_________________
Thank you kindly,
CG

ABSOLUTELY! CityGardener, you just nailed it. Perhaps half of managing incontinence is the much-neglected emotional aspect. As you said, be nice to yourself and "get back into things again." It is too easy to just become a "hermit" and doing that is totally unnecessary.

Look around and ask yourself how many people you see wearing diapers. You don't. I wear NorthShore MegaMax with a booster pad and, if you passed me in the street, you would not notice. Of course, I selected my trousers (black jeans) to accommodate and hide the bulk of the diaper.

By selecting the right diaper, I could wear tighter (more stylish) jeans. However, I have chosen not to have to change my diaper as frequently (I need to stay well-hydrated, per my doctor's directions).

--John
(double incontinent)

JD,
Thanks for affirming my thought about being nicer to myself. Personal growth moment for me. Feel like i've unlocked a new level. I am blessed with an amazing family to support me. My wife has been my zen garden. She was the one who first told me as I was having an especially difficult day that "you can't just be mad at yourself about this all the time". Even my kids, (who now know about my issues thanks to their domestic sleuthing) have shown an a level of maturity and kindness about it that i wasn't expecting. Add the kindness of folks on here and that just leaves me as the only judgemental person in my life right now.

Ha! i also really like that comment about "Look around and ask yourself how many people you see wearing diapers. You don't" That is wise, my man! It's not that there isn't you'd just never know because they are as conspicuous. So maybe as I am standing in a crowd and I get that sudden realization that i might the only one wearing a diaper like some sort of giant toddler, I could use that old public speaking psychology trick and "imagine everyone in their underwear." Hey, it's quite possible there'd be someone there with similar issues.... Yeah, maybe i'll skip imaging people in their underwear part, but the idea that i'm might not be the only one in the room with incontinence is reassuring. Thank you for saying that!

This is good stuff.

_________________
Thank you kindly,
CG