As you all guessed, I had a roommate last year, so I couldn't have hidden it from him well. Then there's the gym locker room, where I'd be bound to be seen. Also, I'd need diapers in my bag all the time, and would be bringing my bag to the bathroom every time, so that would raise red flags among my friends. Finally, the fact that I'm both urinary and fecal incontinent would have made things that much harder to hide. So if I'd chosen to hide it, it would have been very, very stressful; I would have been obsessed all the time with wondering if anyone would find out.
That said, I didn't sit people down and tell them, "I'm incontinent and wear diapers." I did with my roommate--we met through a roommate finder service through the school, I asked for a bedwetter. They don't usually get requests like that, but they put out an email asking if anyone was and would want to room with another one to keep things discreet. Obviously the whole thing was anonymous, but it helped. So we met on Facebook and chatted and I told him then, and we wound up deciding to room together. This year we share an apartment. As for my other friends, I didn't go out of my way to tell them, but I didn't hide it either. Some saw my diapers in the locker room when we went to work out, others when I took my shirt of to play frisbee when it was hot, others I'd just say "I need to change." Some classmates have seen my diapers in my bag. I just act totally cool with it/normal, and nobody cares. Even though I'm mortified, still, every single time someone new finds out. But that's life.
My boyfriend knows as well; he knew when we started talking on grindr, and was accepting the whole way. So that's good too. Usually, though, I would go out of my way to tell people before the first date, so that if it was going to be a problem, I wouldn't get attached. Generally I've found that works best for me, I'd rather people just know and not worry that they'll turn on me.
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