How concerned are you about “bulk”?

[Ellyn]

Please don’t mistake my posts for reaching for sympathy or attention. I have kept much of this to myself for years and feel so much less baggage when I share a little from time to time. Along the way, it starts conversations that may help others. I also try to share much more than maybe I should but if it helps someone feel a little better about their own situation, I’m happy to do it. If I should share less here, just let me know.

[Mr_Robin]

Living with incontinence is a heavy burden to bear. Sometimes it feels good to share this burden together. I you keep too much to yourself, the load will become too heavy. It's one of the numerous mechanisms that can lead to depression. Only at least two persons can share something together. So there nothing wrong and you are clearly not doing this for reaching for sympathy or attention. I'm pretty sure it will help someone feel a little better. You have just to strike your own right balance. We are all human, are we not? Who are we to judge others? So feel free to continue, please.

[JDinVirginia]

It is important not to ignore our emotional health and sharing can be very helpful, particularly when sharing with others who understand our problems and experiences.

Sometimes it is necessary to just "vent" and almost all of us do that from time to time, self included.

--John
(double incontinent)

[Patrick]

Let me second what JD wrote above. I have enormous gratitude and respect for the therapists who have treated me over the years. I would not function as well as I do without their guidance. However, a community of fellow incontinents, who know and understand have a role to play that a therapist can only understand if he/she is also incontinent.

[JDinVirginia]

Re sharing with other incontinents, an incontinent friend and I noted that we tell each other things we have not even shared with our wives.

Sometimes those things are too graphically TMI about how we handle specific problems.

At other times they include our emotional problems in coping with the dark daily reality of our incontinence. Sometimes I would like to just sit down and cry. But, I don't. So, I ocassionally need to share that burden with someone who will understand. Perhaps also, as a guy, I don't want to seem to be "weak" to my spouse, even though she is supportive.

Everyone stay safe!

--John
(double incontinent)

[Drew81]

I used the government enforced 'Stay At Home' yesterday to go through my entire wardrobe and throw out anything that doesn't fit over my nappies. That was a LOT of clothes gone. The ones I've kept don't reveal the bulk.

[JDinVirginia]

Drew, that was a good move. We tend to hold onto old clothing that no longer is practical for hiding a diaper.

--John
(double incontinent)

[Ellyn]

Though I’m careful Not to be around the same people that see me most of the time with cloth diapers (other than family and close friends), I do go out a fair amount with a disposable under my slender fitting clothes, thus two separate wardrobes. My profile is pretty different between cloth and disposable, enough to notice, even in a full dress. I can’t imagine why a guy would discard slimmer fitting clothes, especially if in cloth normally. There’s so many options out there (disposable wise) to be able to “slim down” for special occasions.