www.incontinentsupport.org

I just switched to a different product, and it's quite bulky, but it enables me to not change every hour or so on a bad day, and I sit/lay down most of the day due to other health issues. I'm mildly concerned about the bulk, and sizing up pants would probably solve it, but purchasing a few pairs of new jeans is costly. Living in sweats with compression shorts until then.

I wear Betterdry at night and they are quite bulky but as I live alone, that’s ok.
During the daytime, I prefer less bulky diapers or pants as I can still control a bit my bladder (When restrooms are not too far). When I’m taking a long trip (car, train, or plane), I wear Betterdry. I don’t know if someone has noticed but it stresses me out.

I have major concerns; I'm a smaller female so bulk is definitely more obvious. Combined with the fact that my condition is closeted from my family (I have one friend who is aware), bulk is a huge concern for me. Down to like 3 pairs of clothes I feel comfortable wearing. Bulk is less obvious than wet pants, but still obvious. :/

I have major concerns; I'm a smaller female so bulk is definitely more obvious. Combined with the fact that my condition is closeted from my family (I have one friend who is aware), bulk is a huge concern for me. Down to like 3 pairs of clothes I feel comfortable wearing. Bulk is less obvious than wet pants, but still obvious. :/

I have major concerns; I'm a smaller female so bulk is definitely more obvious. Combined with the fact that my condition is closeted from my family (I have one friend who is aware), bulk is a huge concern for me. Down to like 3 pairs of clothes I feel comfortable wearing. Bulk is less obvious than wet pants, but still obvious. :/

I am concerted but I'll take bulk over thinner protection that makes me feel less secure. When at work I always wear a skirt or dress so hiding my protection really isn't a problem. Whether it's a busy meeting, a one-on-one with with my boss or I am working at my desk, when that urge to pee hits I like the feeling of being well protected. It comes down to feeling confident I guess.

For once, incontinent women have an advantage over incontinent men: skirts and dresses look more suitable to hide our little secret.
I do agree with you : the feeling of being well protected should always be stronger than the fear of being spotted. This is easier said than done.

btw: I can't respond to your pm, guess I am on probation

Generally speaking, I manage my concealment pretty well as I’ve been doing this awhile (a long while...). My largest challenge is concealing the bulk from myself as I’m my worst critic. It’s all about how my life is headed and the mood I guess. My monthly has a lot to do with it too, not to mention occasional depression. It’s all inter-related but I’m not good about recognizing the depression signs or avoiding the fallout.
Point is that bulk directly affects my self image and all that goes with that, but assessing what is bulky today might not bother me at all yesterday or tomorrow! It’s all about the mood for me. During the day, I’m usually much too busy to think about it. I get dressed on auto pilot. I’ve managed my incontinence forever and I’ve learned how to conceal effectively. I don’t fret when I’m out and about.
Yet, sitting here tonight, reading these posts and realizing my legs are being wedged apart with two “new” cloth diapers. My night shirt is more poofy in front and it feels like I’m sitting on a thick pillow.... Normally, my older diapers lose a little thickness so they don’t seem so extreme, but these are very thick!
Why does this bother me? I guess only because I read the posts and in that mood.... I’ll also be aware of the diaper waddle when I get up too! My husband will likely see me waddle and my diapered butt when I get up.... Guess he really must love me!
As long as he doesn’t pat my butt, I’ll be okay. I HATE THAT, but he thinks it’s cute (...!!!).

Ellyn, you're right. Bulk of our damn diaper affects more our self-image than is really noticeable by other people. However, I can't help thinking about it. I also remain concerned about the waddle, the crinkle sound of plastic backed diapers and the sagging.

It's very difficult to recognize the depression signs. I have suffered from seasonal affective disorder (SAD) for a long time so I can recognize some depression signs. However, when depression comes in summer, I tend to deny the evidence.

I hated too when somebody patted my diapered butt. Mom used to do that every time she changed me (a long long time ago). Tell you husband it's definitely not cute (and yet I'm a man).