www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi, Wayne. Thanks for responding and for the birthday wishes. My self-loathing comes mainly from the issue of now that my husband and I are retired, he wants us to do some traveling. We managed our income and expenses wisely throughout our working years and now we can comfortably afford to take a moderately-priced trip once a year or so for the next few years. I love to travel. I want to see Norway and take an American Cruise Lines river cruise before I can't do that anymore. I have mild-stage Glaucoma in my right eye and severe stage in my left, and I don't feel comfortable driving anymore. I've had Ulcerative Colitis for the past 25 years, but I manage it well, for the most part. I use a cane for walking on hilly and/or uneven terrain, but I'm not easily winded. The elephant in the room is my daytime incontinence and sleepwetting. My daytime volumes are quite heavy, and I worry that I'll have a huge leak in public. It hasn't happened yet, but I'm usually not out and about very much for very long. I always carry @least 2 pull-ups in my purse and 1 in the car @all times. I also bring a tote bag w/4 pull-ups in it if I think restroom access will be chancy. My sleepwetting volumes are moderate. I rarely have a leak, and when I do I almost never wet the bed cuz I use a surface bed pad (I like GoodNites disposables). The chances of my wetting a hotel or cruise ship bed are slim, IMO, but back when I had my 2nd relapse @age 25 in 1976, I wet a hotel bed twice in the course of a year. I was having a hard time accepting the fact that I was once again a bedwetter, and because absorbent garments weren't available yet (Depends were the first, and they came on the market in 1984), I had to rely on period pads, which were largely ineffective. Each time it happened (2 different hotel chains) I rolled the bedcovers back so as to allow the bedding to dry as much as possible before housekeeping came to service the room. I reasoned that it would be less abhorrent for the staff to touch sheets containing dried urine residue, as opposed to wet urine. Back in the day, no one wore latex gloves except surgeons. I then wrote a note to the staff, explaining that I had a nighttime accident and apologizing for the inconvenience that I'd caused. I left a crisp $20 bill (a lot of money in 1976) as an in-room tip, in addition to the percentage tip I added to the bill @check-out time. The experience still upsets me.