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Support for dealing with incontinence
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PostPosted: Sat Mar 09, 2019 11:05 am 
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Joined: Fri Jun 06, 2014 4:58 am
Posts: 67
During the day I wear incontinence underwear. You don't see it and it gives a lot of rest and peace. So, no, I don't feel ashamed for it. At night I wear night diapers. My wife supports me and I have no issue with it. On a regular basis I have to travel for work. During long flights I wear a diaper as I'm afraid that I fall asleep and ... yes, I get wet. Wearing jeans one size larger, plastic pants and a body gives me a lot of confidence that all will be OK. My wife convinces me that you can't see it, so I assume that no one will see it. I think I'm getting used to it. For sure I don't like wearing it, but if I have to chose between a lot of stress & being very insecure, or being happy, no stress and having confidence .... well, I chose for the second option.
Cheers, Bob


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 02, 2019 11:36 am 
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Joined: Mon Jun 08, 2015 6:15 am
Posts: 91
No. I dont feel embarrassed or ashamed, that I have to wear diapers. I felt embarrassed when I had to deal with continues wet pants and ruined furniture, and ruined mattresses.
I took control of my incontinence in a mature way, and began using appropriate protection aka absorbent products. Simply to contain wetness from my clothes and furniture. As others have said, my incontinence also worsened, and I was back in full diapers.
Should I feel embarrassed by it? Hell no. I don't flaunt what I wear, nor disclose it to anyone, simply because I don't have to. I have never been outed or pointed at. I behave in a dignified way, and wants to be treated and regarded as anyone else.
For me diapers are a tool for my bladder, just as the glasses I wear is because of my eyes not being as good as they once were.

Sorry for my harsh tone. But I'm sick of having to see this stigma towards incontinent people like myself. Yes, we pee our pants because we have no say in the matter. And because of this takes decisions on how to deal with it.


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 22, 2019 9:27 pm 
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Joined: Mon Sep 03, 2018 5:54 pm
Posts: 6
Location: Pineville, Louisiana
I try my hardest for people not to notice I am wearing a diaper. I have Urge Incontinence and the doctor says it's a dysfunctional bladder and doesn't know what to do for a solution. He told me to keep wearing diapers. I have had a couple of instances of people noticing my diapers. I have really given up on being embarrassed though. It's part of my life and I will enjoy my life. I went and washed my truck yesterday. While I was washing my truck, two guys walked up and asked if they can see how the tailgate of my truck is. It's a 2019 GMC Sierra with the multifunctional tailgate. I showed them the tailgate and then the inside of my truck. One guy asked about my under seat storage. I showed it to them and opened the lid. I forgot I didn't put all my diapers in the bag stored in in there. They saw them clear as day, but never said a word and I didn't really care. The second time, was later that same day. I went to see Fallen Angel at the movie theatre. When I walked up and I had my backpack with me. The guy at the counter asked me if I could leave my backpack in my vehicle. I told him it was medical and showed my Handicap ID Card. Then he proceeded to ask me what my condition was. I wasn't about to explain to him that I have Incontinence issues and I have to wear diapers. I just told him medical and they asked for me to show them what was in my bag. I was about to unzip it to discreetly show them, then the manager said for me to show her inside. When I walked in to see her, I opened my backpack and showed her the diapers and supplies. She seemed embarrassed and asked me if I had any weapons in my bag. I said no and she didn't even proceed to search my bag. I wasn't embarrassed, but I was aggravated at the guy working the counter. Oh well, things happen and we just move on with life. My selection for best diaper all around, would be the NorthShore Care Supremes. A little expensive, but I’ve been amazed at the absorbency. They do swell, but they will last you a long time, even if you are a heavy wetter. The leak guards do their jobs. I use to think I could compare these to Tranquility ATN’s, but they are better compared to Abena M4’s and better than the Abena M4’s. Just my opinion and I know everyone has their own opinion.


Last edited by InconLouisiana1983 on Mon Sep 23, 2019 12:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 22, 2019 10:00 pm 
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Joined: Sat Mar 29, 2014 11:45 am
Posts: 1836
You taught those folks a lesson tat will serve us all. Bravo!


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 25, 2019 5:29 am 
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Joined: Sun Jan 25, 2015 9:13 am
Posts: 397
At first I was embarrassed but now after almost 5 years I no longer worry about people noticing my diapers and have no problems openly talking about incontinence issues if the subject comes up.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 26, 2019 12:53 am 
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Joined: Sat Oct 24, 2015 2:42 am
Posts: 65
Location: United Kingdom
It's been 10 years since I first started having bladder issues, and six years since I started wearing diapers. I got over the fear of public embarrassment pretty quickly, but the toughest one was getting changed in front of my wife. I think I'm almost over that, but I still hesitate a bit to take my diaper off in front of her. Putting one on isn't a problem, but there's something about untaping a wet one and cleaning myself up when she can see.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 26, 2019 11:36 am 
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Joined: Sun Feb 03, 2019 12:57 am
Posts: 48
I feel the same around my spouse. I’ve recently had an injury and opted for help from my sister and a home health care worker. He is supportive but it still bothers me. Interesting topic.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 26, 2019 5:35 pm 
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Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2018 4:52 pm
Posts: 265
Location: Central Texas, USA
Embarrassed? I’ve been wearing diapers for most of my life and deal with most situations pretty well I think.
When people learn of my health issues and / or use of diapers, by far, most are very supportive. The reality of it though is that few know as I conceal pretty well.
Yet, I too have a hang up about removing a soaked diaper in front of my husband. Usually removing a damp diaper or pinning one on in front of him doesn’t bother me. Him seeing my putting on a diaper doesn’t bother him, he claims.
On occasion, I will show an outline of my diaper in front of my boys or very close friends, who obviously know. When I notice them noticing, I smooth things out but don’t feel “embarrassed”. This is just the way it is. I am who I am.
This brings up an interesting secondary question though... Does seeing me with outlines of a diaper or God forbid accidentally flashing make others embarrassed? If I am unknowingly showing an outline, I’m not aware of it.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 27, 2019 3:30 pm 
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Joined: Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:03 pm
Posts: 167
@ Ellyn:

The accidental 'flash' you speak of or diaper lines and bulk are nearly totally overlooked by others or just not even noticed.

I'd say only others with similar concerns might be the only ones who'd pick up on whats going on. Still, I don't see how they
would feel embarrassed, since they'd be only among the very few who'd notice such things.

But --

What would cause me embarrassment would be seeing obvious leaks onto clothing due to overflow or inadequate protection.
Ditto for detectable odors due to personal hygiene issues. If those conditions happened to me, I'd understand that others
who notice might feel embarrassment for the situation I was trying to deal with.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 27, 2019 8:27 pm 
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Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2018 4:52 pm
Posts: 265
Location: Central Texas, USA
I haven’t had a leak for a very long time. I plan for flooding, which occurs only occasionally. Most often, it’s a “spurt” or a continuous slow leak... I don’t believe that there are odorS involved as there isn’t external leakage and I wear good quality waterproof pants. I clean up pretty thoroughly at changes. I did have and continue to occasionally have intestinal issues but they are now rare. The plastic pants do a good job containing those odors too.
The outlines I was referring to are the outlines while bending over or the bulge in front when sitting. I wear casual dresses most often that usually have a fuller skirt but still when sitting on a sofa or chair, there’s a puffiness there that I’m very aware of. Crossing my legs helps. I find my hands on my lap a lot and can become self conscious sometimes, depending on the situation.


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