www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi,

I'm new to this forum.
Short on me, I have OAB with urge incontinense, just...although on a moderate level, and usually I can make it to the restroom.
However there are times, where I just don't make it (the urge)....and it floods

I'm very new to having to deal with this and still have to adapt to how life just suddenly turns things up side down.
Until recently I could manage with only using light pads but things got worse and I wen't from light to moderate...My doctor can't really come up with any viable reason...nerves etc. works, I just can't clinch enough apparently. And then I just floods the brief...

However back to my reason asking about the specifik type of briefs, Tena Flex and insert pads, Tena flex it's a belted brief with allows you to, if you make it, do things "normally" and since I don't have any issues with bowel movements I don't see the reason using full tape briefs, since the tapes usually sucks second time, also at nighttime usually I can make it to the restroom if nessesary.

Until now, I'm using pull-ups tried both Abriflex M3 and Tena Maxi, but I have to change too often at work, which isn't very convienient, so would either Tena flex, belted brief or Attends contour 9 insert pads get me through a normal working day without leaks (which I have experienced with both type of pull-ups
I never know just how much there's on it's way....so my current calculation, that the pull-ups can handle two or three wettings depending on the volume, that has let me down from time to time.
So know I'm looking for protection which I can rely on during the day - one change during work hours are ok....I can do it in lunch time, where there isn't many around..

http://www.tena.com.au/general/products/tena-flex/
http://www.attendslifestyles.co.uk/cont ... l-2064.htm

I appreciate any advice....

I hate to be the one to break it to you, but for the amount of time you want to go between changes a full brief is you best bet. You might want to look at the Molicare Super or Super Plus. Both are descent. The Super Plus should get you to lunch most days. The Super can usually handle one large wetting, or 2 or 3 smaller releases. Some days they work great to get me through for 4 or 5 hours. Other days they are not enough.

The pads and belted garments are designed for minor leakage and are designed to be changed as soon as they are wet.

_________________
When life hands you a lemon, make lemonade.

hmm my reason for not going for the full brief, was the flexibility...of using the restroom when I could manage it and still get the brief on / off. Which with a full brief is quite hard...tapes just suck on them.
Also I need something which is discrete, as I don't wan't to be on full dispaly at my work as the "Diaper guy"...no one know I'm having bladder issues, and I'd like it to stay that way...I sneek my diaperbag into a far away toilet and sneek it out again in the end of the day.
and when I need to change I can do it fairly discrete....I read some reviews for the Molicare super and super plus, and they are as thick as the Abena x-plus...which isn't discrete at all

First off, Welcome to our forum and sorry about your life getting turned upside down! Incon certainly does that.... you take being dry for granted and find one day it isn't easy keeping dry and on another day, it isn't even possible to stay dry....grrrrrrrrrrr!

I hope we can help with support and ideas so you can get on with life after discovering diapers are needed!

I have to agree with SeattleDoug, that you are expecting too much from a pull up and, as you said, a pull up is not convenient to change! So a full brief...tape on....is what is going to give you the leak free performance you want.

Yes, sticky tapes are lousy; as much as they say they are "refastenable", they really aren't to be depended on once you pull them open. But the hook and loop (think Velcro) fastening that some diapers use are very good and can be refastened securely over and over again. You will find these typically in a "cloth like backed" diaper, in the case of Abena, it is the Aire plus (I think).

Some find they can get by with looser taping of the top tapes so they can just pull the diaper down without undoing the tapes and pull the diaper back up. It takes a little effort to get the diaper back up but it can be done. You can offset the tendency of the diaper to sag by wearing something like form fitting cotton briefs, maybe Spandex briefs...like compression shorts, maybe an Abena body shirt. Or maybe just cotton whitie tighties may provide enough support for the diaper.

As for the concealment issue, I think you are where all of us were, when we first faced wearing diapers under our clothing. And that is feeling the whole world will know that we are wearing a diaper! It takes some time to realize that people do not notice and our own perception that "every one can tell" will give way to the realization that diapers don't show and people really don't know and you look the same as you always have....or, in reality, the difference is not perceptible when you have a diaper on under your clothing. I know, that's probably hard for you to believe right now.

Another way to look at it.....which do you think is more noticeable: a wet spot / leak line? or slight puffiness in your pants? to use one of our member's (Puffy Pants) characterization of diaper wearing. Again, to you it feels thick and noticeable....you look in the mirror and swear it is easy to see..... but the real world reality, fortunately, is people are too busy going about their own business to notice if your pants seem a little "puffier" than they used to.

Of course, I am assuming you are not wearing tight fashion and going with a relaxed fit and maybe even up-size one size and stop worrying about people noticing.

Best of luck.....let us know how it goes.

I have to agree with JoeK. People will not notice you wearing diapers under your clothes. Other people are far too wrapped up in their own lives to be concerned with anyone else. I have had the same issues with disposable diapers with "reusable" tapes. The better ones come with two tapes on each tape. The first one is for initial placement then the top tape can be undone and retaped without affecting the diaper at all. I have found these don't always work as planned but they do work better than some. The hook and loop disposable diapers work well too. But, I never liked the cloth backed diapers to begin with. I did find however that I could wear a quality plastic backed disposable, such as the Abena or the Dry24/7 and pull it down over my hips in the back if needed and replace it without much trouble. I have also pulled them completely off and replaced them with minor adjustments. It can be done and dealt with.

Now, all that to say, I have now switched to cloth diapers and plastic pants for protection. I utilize a cloth diaper with a velcro hook and loop. I use prefold diapers that are rectangular and add a little buld between the legs. But, there are contour cloth diapers with hook and loop strips on them that would not be as bulky, would allow for taking off easily and reattaching easily. You don't throw them out after you use them but simply wash them and reuse them. If you are planning a mid day change, you would still need to bring a change with you but you would need to bring a plastic bag or something with you to bring the soiled one home to wash. They are more expensive per diaper than disposable, probably about what you pay per pack of disposable for each diaper. But, one purchase of cloth diapers can literally last you for over a year possibly more. So, in the long run, it is more economical and better for the environment. If you want to talk more about cloth as an option and/or have any questions, please feel free to PM me. I will be happy to help.

You can and will get through this. I have found this site and especially the people here to be very helpful and encouraging. We are all going through the same thing in one way or another. You have made a very brave and great first step by reaching out to the right group. We are here to help and support you.

_________________
"Why is the rum always gone?" - Captain Jack Sparrow

"There is no human problem which could not be solved if people would simply do as I advise." -
Gore Vidal

The Molicare Super Plus is not as thick as the Abena M4. The Super Plus is about 20% thinner. The Super is about 60% thinner than the M4, but it will not do what you are asking.

If you are worried about the tapes not sticking look a Secure Personal Care. They X-Plus is a little bulky but it very good and the tapes are very strong and refastenable.

http://www.securepersonalcare.com/brief ... c-1_2.html

The next step down uses the same tapes but it much more discrete.

http://www.securepersonalcare.com/brief ... c-1_4.html

Both are excellent products and have very strong tapes and a tape landing zone. The brief doesn't rip when you need to release a tape and they don't use the horrid 2 tape method that most manufactures use. They also have a brief that is pretty good, but not as good as the X-Plus. You might want to order a couple samples from Secure Personal Care and see if they have anything that will work for you.

http://www.securepersonalcare.com/prote ... c-5_7.html

If you are worried about people seeing you as "Diaper guy", relax. As already said most people are focused on themselves too much to worry about you. If you are wearing comfortably loose clothes nobody will know. I have worn a Dry 24/7 under denim relaxed fit jeans and nobody noticed. If they did they didn't say anything about it.

One of the reasons I prefer a tape on diaper instead of pull-on is so I can change without taking my shoes and pants all the way off if I have to change in a public restroom. With a pull-on you have to undress from the waist down to put a new one on. With a tape on diaper I can pull my pants down to my knees and change without any issues. I just wish the VA had a contract with Secure Personal Care. In my opinion that is the best adult diaper on the market for easy of use and leak protection. I have had some real large discharges and never had a significant leak with the SPC X-Plus.

On another note, the Abena Air-Plus M4 is NOT as good as the plastic backed M4 for several reasons. The tapes and not the refastenable velro type. They are a sticky tape that can only be attached once. It will peel the cloth cover off of the backing if you try to reposition it. The second layer of tape, yes it's a two tape system, does the same thing if you need to tighten the fit to prevent sagging. The cloth sides are not strong enough to get a snug fit and keep it snug so it will sag, or you'll rip the tapes right off the back wings trying to get a snug fit. The cloth backing wicks moisture from the edge of the leak barriers causing leaks that the plastic backed version doesn't experience. Because of the listed issues I wear vinyl or PUL pants over the Air-Plus to prevent leaks and sagging, negating the benefits of the breathable material, but allowing me some dignity. If I can get the VA to get me either the original plastic backed M4 or the SPC X-Plus I would be in much better shape for protection.

I hope you find a happy balance to work for you.

_________________
When life hands you a lemon, make lemonade.

Hi and welcome I have similar issues with urge incontinence, and I find
Molicare for men very good. I have been trying other things in the Molicare range and find them excellent.
but I am a bit nervous of wearing full diapers because of descression
mainly. I think it depends on the work you do,
I am outdoors a lot and changing can be difficult.

Wow, thanks for the support !
It's a pleasure being part of your community! although it's not voluntarily....

It's sort of releasing hearing from you experienced guys....
What have I done so far. I have bought a pack of Tena flex super and some attends contour 9 together with molicare fixing pants....the Tena have velcro and and can just as a Tena slip be changed without removing all clothes from the waist down.
+ Tena says they are leak free...same goes with the Attends contour's I do plan on using a booster insert in them to expand their capabilities and have them fixed by the Molicare fixing pants to prevent too much notification....BTW I'm a jeans guy..
What they have as the Abena doesen't is odor control....which is another concern of mine....one thing is the diaper holding up, another thing which I fear are smelling of urine...I know of the odor pills you can get like Nullo, but I just don't like taking too much medication (pills).
I have had some very unpleasant surprises from pills in the past (painkillers) which gave me an aversion against them.

So next question, are there any products you can use together with your protection which will cover up the smell or at least mask them like a spary or something...I tried babypowder, but somehow I still believe I can smell some odor coming from my protection?

Sure, there are sprays that are specifically for neutralizing odor in diapers. The one I have always used and can recommend is "Fresh Again Incontinent Odor Spray".

You will find it offered by Home Delivery Incontinent Supplies www.hdis.com where you'll have to do a site search to bring it up. The description currently on the site is:

<Get complete odor control with this revolutionary product. Can be sprayed directly onto absorbent products, bed pans, toilets, etc. It's water based and non-irritating to your skin. Fresh Again eliminates the production of odor-causing molecules by inhibiting bacterial enzymes. It may also be used as a pre-treat before laundering soiled bedding, clothing and undergarments.>

I really can't add much that has not already been said. The "best" diaper I have ever used for refastening is the Secure X-Plus. They have an area on the diaper that is specially designed for fastening diaper tapes called the "landing zone". Diaper tapes can be refastened several times using this specailly designed area of the diaper. The other positive things about this diaper is it is very absorbent and discrete. I would recommend give this diaper a try. I think this is this best product that fits your needs.

There are several odor protection products on the market from pills to sprays. Sprays are much cheaper to use compared to taking odor control tablets such as Nullo, Devrom, etc. I agree with JoeK, "Fresh Again", is a very good product so you might want to try this product as well.

Hopes this helps to narrow things down some for you.

Keep us posted on what you try, and what works best for you.