I've had to tell various people about my inco, my late wife, (then my girlfriend), who was a nurse and totally accepted it as part of me. I've also had to tell various health care professionals - which in one particualr circumstance didn't help at all! and probably the most difficult my pastor. About 6-8 months ago my inco changed in so much that I was getting a lot more volume combined with a total emptying of my bladder, this meant that my then current protection (stick on inco pads) failed to absorb most of the urine and I very obviosuly and very badly leaked. As I was inthe process of applying for membership to the church I felt the Pastor needed to know the reason for my continued abscence from church. He was fine about it, but since childhood I have always found interacting with men difficult (father was sexually abusive,, left a lot of scars physical and emotional).
THE one time that being open about my inco became a problem was when I was due to have minor surgery which involved a spinal anaesthetic as well as an overnight stay in the local hospital. On the pre-surgery check for mrsa, weight and BP checks I told the ward sister that I had bladder inco and that post surgery I would need a minimum of a conti sheet on the bed or ideally a disposable nappy as I would be paralised from the waist down until the anaesthetic wore off, after that I could self care, but would need a conti sheet on the bed overnight in case of leaks. The Sister assured me that it wouldn't be a problem. Came out of surgery, no sheet, pad or nappy, so at 54 I wet the bed and then had to tell a nurse who looked about 16 what had happened, somewhat embarrasing to say the least. However once they cleaned me and the bed up they decide it might be a good idea to put a conti sheet on the bed.
I've also had to tell other people mainly the mother in law when we started staying over at Easter and Christmas and on e of my late wife's Aunt's, as I needed some clothes adapting, although from what I asked her to do to my clothes she probably worked out what it was for anyway.
So my advice, tell people who need to know, do it in as confident manner as you can, don't go into great detail. I think you'll find most people will accept what you tell them.
Kelvin
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