www.incontinentsupport.org

The way I figure it, if you are having fun, and enjoying yourself, and it isn't hurting anyone else, then who am I to judge you for wanting to wear diapers?

Have to admit when I first found out about the AB/DL people, I was a bit repulsed. But then I realized...so, what exactly, are they doing to harm me? Nothing. They just like wearing/using diapers. Big whoop. Heck sometimes I sit around and wish I liked it, then maybe my problem might be a bit more enjoyable :S.

I spent the holidays in my wifes grandparents lakehouse. We had 13 people in the house. Let me tell you, it is hard to keep something like incontinence a secret when your sleeping with other people sharing a room with you. The house had 5 bedrooms and 3 baths. Plenty of space. Sharing a room with me and my wife were my wifes two sisters. Yes in case you were wondering, there were two seperate queen size beds in this big room with an air matress on the floor. My mother and father in law were in the bedroom next door. We all shared a spacious bathroom. I kept my diapers behind the bed where no one could see. I realized early in the trip though that I could keep my secret. As mentioned in my previous posts, my mother and father in law already knew of my condition. We have stayed with them many times and I felt it was pointless for them to no know when I carry a backpack with diapers in it everywhere I go. I ended up telling my youngest sister in law because we went to lunch together and I took my bag with me for a change. She had some questions but was very receptive. She asked about surgery and medications etc. I gave her a brief rundown and explained the situation and she made no comments. She just expressed her concern. I told my other sister in law as well. Living that close and sharing a room with these people made it extremely difficult to keep my secret. So I just told her about my problem. She too was caring and made no comments. I also told my wifes grandmother. I am very close to my wifes grandparents. They are like my own as all mine are deceased. So I call her Nana. I asked her for a trashbag to throw away bathroom trash in. She asked if it was for my youngest boys diapers? I told her no. I explained to her that I have a bladder condition and I leak urine. I told her that I have to wear pads and all she said was oh, thats no big deal. She gave me a trash bag to use and told me I could throw away my stuff in the garage and slip out the back door so no one had to see me carrying them through the house. It worked out well. So overall, I have told my immediate family and my wifes immdiate family. I only tell those that need to know. I don't like having to worry about hiding my condition. I don't want to be ashamed and do not feel like I should be. I just have a medical condition and have to wear diapers. Out of all the people I have told, not one of them has made fun of me. I have told them all nonchalantly and just explained the situation. It has gone over well.

Don,
Glad to hear all went well. We always sweat the stress you are going to have trying to hide this, but going ahead and explaining your needs eliminates that stress. A little embarrassment to go through, but your that goes away as they all accept it as no big deal. Your post should be a help to others having to go through this. .... Paul Martin

Jonbasic,

I don't have a desire to tell the whole world either. I only tell those that need to know such as close famly whom I either live with or in the case of the holidays, stay with for an extended period of time. It is very difficult to hide complete incontinence from close family when you are around these people 24/7. People start to get very suspicious very quickly. Most won't ask but I feel honesty is the best policy. So I just come out and tell people about in an honest way in a private conversation one on one. I am very close to my family on both sides and everyone knows I have health problems. So it just makes things easier so I can live my life and take care of my needs as I see fit without fear of embarassment. I feel that incontinence doesn't have to cause shame. I don't go around telling everyone, my incon issues are a personal thing and if I feel a person doesn't need to know, I won't offer the information. Outside of close family, the only ones who know are my doctors. I don't feel like its that big of a deal and its definitely not something I'm ashamed of. I just want to live a happy life and my incon issues aren't going to hold me down. I have a can do attitude.

The only people I actually tell, besides the people who are definitely going to find out, are people at whose houses I frequently stay. If they know, it just makes the whole process easier for me. It wasn't easy originally, but over time I've found it's easier than explaining a leak on someone's sheets.