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Support for dealing with incontinence
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PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 3:37 am 
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Joined: Wed Jul 20, 2011 8:31 am
Posts: 7
Location: Cardiff, South Wales, UK
Hi again,
You would think that the nursing staff of any hospital or clinic would know better and would be more helpful. Whilst I can normally help myself and change myself the time I wet the bed in hospital was because I'd had spinal anasthaesia and was basically paralysed from the waist down and when I came out of surgery they didn't even put a conti sheet on the pad let alone the nappy that I had provided for them. THe same in your case,the fact that you were wet and had to get them to re-make your bed should have told them you needed further help. Perhaps it's me but the younger generation of nurses just don't seem to have the same compassion/caring attidute that earlier generations did, not to memention some common sense.


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 07, 2011 10:31 am 
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Joined: Mon Sep 08, 2008 1:47 pm
Posts: 578
I don't tell anyone that doesn't have a need to know. Only certain menbers of my family and friends know. I have some very good friends that I have not shared my disabilities with. I've always had the thought if my incon didn't affect someone why say anything about it? If you don't go around telling others what color socks your wearing why would you want to disclose such personal information about yourself being incon when it doesn't affect them? Some of my cloest friends know I have back issues, but they don't know I wear diapers and I have no intention of telling them when they don't have a need to know.

I'm planning on doing some flying in October, and unless I'm asked, or need to tell the TSA people at the airport, I don't plan on telling them I'm wearing a diaper. However, if I'm singled out for a security check then, and only then would it be appropriate for me to tell the TSA people thain I'm incon and I'm wearing a diaper. If there is no reason to disclose, or tell anyone friends, family, etc., I don't tell anyone.


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 Post subject: telling others
PostPosted: Sun Aug 07, 2011 10:41 am 
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Joined: Wed Jul 20, 2011 8:31 am
Posts: 7
Location: Cardiff, South Wales, UK
Hi Johnstone,
I'm not sure who or what TSA is/are, but if you live in the states, I would suggest you let them know before hand as there have been some horror stories coming out of the staates recently about nappy wearers being given a really rough time at security check in. I agree on the whole that it should be need to know, I don't go around advertising the fact I have less bladder control than a 2 year old.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 01, 2011 7:36 pm 
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Joined: Tue Aug 30, 2011 11:03 pm
Posts: 2
Location: Arizona
Johnstone,
I am a frequent traveler and wear diapers whenever I am out of the house, especially when traveling. I have never been questioned about the diapers in my carry on bag or the one I am wearing. So, I believe there is no need to tell the TSA agent about your situation unless asked.

Good luck and enjoy your trip!

Rick


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 01, 2011 11:56 pm 
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Joined: Sun May 30, 2010 1:00 am
Posts: 117
Location: WA
I don't go around "advertising" the facts, but I don't make a big deal over hiding it either. Some people figure it out just from the comments I make.
My step daughter died, leaving us with two grandkids to raise, the youngest ask my wife why there were so many adult diapers around, she told him to ask me. I answered him and she filled in the rest (about my MS). So, nothing more has been said. I don't go around the house with a diaper/plastic pants showing however.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 17, 2011 8:56 pm 
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Joined: Tue Oct 11, 2011 9:35 pm
Posts: 24
I've told several people since my bedwetting problems come back up again. A couple people, I've even talked in depth with about it, once I figured out they were open to listening. Helps me to explain my decision process to someone I know well, I guess. Only internet friends, mind you, there is something about the distance that helps but the both of us more at ease.

There was a really nasty situation on another forum, unrelated to incontinence, where someone found out about my problem, started running their mouth about it, making fun of me, etc, conveniently forgetting to mention that it was a medical problem. Trying to make me out to be one of those AB/DL folks I guess. Now like I said in my intro thread nothing against those people in fact if it wasn't for them I probably wouldn't have finally found a diaper that actually does what it is supposed to do. But, regardless, still upsetting.

Once I got over it and realized how pathetic a person must be if they need to make fun of someone with a disability to make themselves feel better, I realized...hmm. A bunch of people found out that I wear diapers, and I'm no worse off for it. 90% of them really just did not care. And I think there's some truth to that, most mature adults, they do not care if you are wearing briefs boxers panties or diapers. Reaction is mostly met with a shrug of the shoulders. And really I guess that is the way it should be - what difference does it make to me if someone I barely know is wearing a diaper? Big whoop.

Since then, I've not been shy about telling people. I don't go out of my way, I mean, I don't PM someone out of the blue and say "Hey, guess what, I've got a medical problem, want to hear all about it?" But I will mention it if it is relevant to the subject of conversation, if it's just between me and someone else, something private. Don't particularly want to go blabbing about it in a public forum. But a private conversation, sure. And 100% of the people I have told this to them like this, they don't care. They are not grossed out they are not judgmental, it is literally a sort of shoulder shrug reaction. Now granted I don't have to deal with them every day and if I don't want to I can just not come online and talk to them. Haven't told people I actually know IRL.

And now that I think about it, before my problems started, if someone had told me they had to wear diapers, that would have been my reaction to. Sort of a..."so? does not change how I think about you. should it matter to me that your underwear is thicker than most people's?"

So, I don't worry about it too much anymore. If someone found out IRL I would of course tell them but I'm a bit more forthcoming online.


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 Post subject: Re: telling others
PostPosted: Tue Oct 18, 2011 2:01 pm 
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Joined: Sat Aug 23, 2008 3:04 pm
Posts: 344
Location: SLC
kelvin45 wrote:
Hi Johnstone,
I'm not sure who or what TSA is/are, but if you live in the states, I would suggest you let them know before hand as there have been some horror stories coming out of the staates recently about nappy wearers being given a really rough time at security check in.


I recently flew back home to see family. Was diapered, had diapers in my carry on, changed in the airport restroom. Never had a single problem. Not one second glance, not one statement, no issues with security at all. I still feel uncomfortable about having to be scanned and checked like I am some sort of criminal, but as certain government organizations have the ability to ignore the Bill of Rights at will I don't think there is anything that can be done about it.

_________________
~~PuddleGuy


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 19, 2011 4:34 pm 
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Joined: Mon Oct 17, 2011 2:56 am
Posts: 37
Only my wife and unfortunatly our 4 yr old son who we are trying to break from bed wetting know. I really wish she did not know. Most of the time she is kind but on a bad day she will say something unkind. I hate that my son knows I wear a diaper while I am wanting to not wear one. I like having a forum I can talk in with other people with my problems and not having all of those mentally messed up perves who wear diapers for some sick thrill. Before I found this forum I only ever found sites full of messed up people glad I found this.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2011 7:43 am 
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Joined: Thu Dec 09, 2004 1:04 pm
Posts: 705
Location: Tennessee
Justin,

Glad to see you appreciate the forum. That's why we are all here, to support one another for what ever reason. It's got to be pretty rough for incontinent people out there who have no one to turn to. ......Paul Martin


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2011 2:42 pm 
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Joined: Sat Aug 23, 2008 3:04 pm
Posts: 344
Location: SLC
justin wrote:
I like having a forum I can talk in with other people with my problems and not having all of those mentally messed up perves who wear diapers for some sick thrill. Before I found this forum I only ever found sites full of messed up people glad I found this.


Judge not, for ye shall also be judged.

Just because you don't like or understand ABDL doesn't mean all those people are "pervs" or "messed up." Every community has its freaks, but I've spoken with a number of decent upstanding ABDLs over the years... one of them being my wife. ABDL has actually done a lot for the IC community too. ABDLs are extremely picky about their diapers, the fit, the feel, the capacity... and they spend a good deal of money on the top brands, which means demand stays high so manufacturers are less likely to change things for the worse. You can disagree with their reasons for wearing diapers, but that's no excuse for judgment or name calling.

_________________
~~PuddleGuy


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