Active careers / life with incontinence

[Don]

Dennis,
I replied to another post of yours on a similar topic. I don’t think it’s necessary to “out yourself” to your friends. I’ve been incontinent for 10 years and have never been confronted by anyone (except medical providers). I wear Abena M4’s with an abri-let booster. Not the stealthiest concoction, but I do what’s necessary. That combination can get me through most prolonged situations of day outings which can include dinner with friends. I keep my backpack of supplies in my car. Except for a bowel accident, I try to time my changes accordingly. If I’m having GI issues, I change immediately. But as far as just urine, I can usually wait for an opportune moment. This may work for you. I wouldn’t go telling people about my health issues if I don’t have to. I think you’d be opening yourself up to a Q&A session you may not want or need. Just my two cents.

[BRDW]

It can be done. I was wearing mere shields and guards for awhile, but once I realized that I was having increased urge issues for both bladder and bowel, I made the jump to pull-ups. Since then, I've gotten my confidence back and no one can tell. And at least for me- they work well and help.

[sociologygeek]

I have been able to work 3 different settings (camp, Walmart, substitute teaching) all while diapered. I disclosed my situation to one of the principals and he was VERY discreet and understanding. I now work from home so its less of an issue, but I'm pretty proud looking back on how I manage. It was difficult at first coming to terms with my incontinence returning. The sudden and unexplained occurrence left me reeling. For those who don't know, I was in the worst place and time for it to reoccur. I was at work at my Walmart job 3rd shift. I started wetting out of the blue.. I was so embarrassed. i didn't want to buy protection on my lunch break because 3rd shift is a close knit body, so i knew everyone working there including the cashier. I bought some attends ASAP. I was relieved wehn i could get off and buy depend. Going from that to where i am now just amazes me. Living with incontinence isn't easy. The longer ive been dealing with it though the less over time it has bothered me and impacted me. A huge part of this is becoming comfortable with the reality and less worried about being exposed to other people.

Peace out!

[Porkchop]

Other health issues keep me less than active, the diapers helped me unchain myself from the bathroom and slowly start the process of healing and getting away from the bathroom. Still, back issues make self-diapering a chore and I am blessed with my supportive wife. Not sure how I'd manage without her.

[schooner]

I have severe OAB due to Tarlov cysts on my S3 sacral nerve and have been managing the incontinence with adult diapers since 1987. From that time to the present I have raised two daughters (the youngest is finishing her freshman year in high school), worked steadily and enjoyed a normal married life. With some minor lifestyle and wardrobe adjustments, I have been able to lead an active and normal life, most recently wearing Confidry diapers, booster pads (smaller pad during the day, larger pad at night) and plastic pants. There are issues that I have to deal with from time to time, but overall, after nearly thirty years of experimentation, refinement and setbacks I have a system that is nearly perfect for me.

I'm sure that I face the same challenges that most everyone in this forum does...frustration, embarrassment, concealing diapers under normal clothing, leaks, changing in public restrooms, expense, etc. Finding an appropriate management technique is vital, as is the support of family and friends, as well as healthy connections with others who deal with incontinence. Honestly sharing your story with others will help you as much as it helps them. It's been a long road for me, and very challenging at times, but with the help of family and friends, excellent incontinence products and a superior forum such as this, it goes well for me!