successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Sat Oct 07, 2017 2:51 am
Just thought id report that despite my incontinence, I have been successful on the dating scene. I met someone in May and we dated for 4 months, and even got intimate...she knew about my incontinence and didnt care. Unfortunately, we went our separate ways; she had some issues she needed to sort out before she was ready for a relationship. I am now talking to a Catholic woman in my town. I disclosed my incontience to her and she says she doesnt think less of me. Just goes to show you when it comes to dating, you shouldnt worry too much. If a person is truly for you, they wont care. Those that do care are probably really shallow and not worth your time anyway.
Peace out!
Peace out!
Re: successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Sat Oct 07, 2017 7:06 am
Great news I hope you do find that special person.
Re: successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Sat Oct 07, 2017 9:40 am
That's good news to hear and share with the group. While I am lucky to have an extremely supportive wife, the thought of dating with diapers/protection would be nerve wracking. Good luck!
Re: successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Sat Oct 07, 2017 12:09 pm
Great to hear - best wishes, sg!!
W.
W.
Re: successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Sat Oct 07, 2017 10:13 pm
Add my congratulations and best wishes.
Re: successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Sun Oct 08, 2017 5:49 am
Thats Great News 
Re: successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Fri Oct 20, 2017 12:43 am
Congratulations. To be honest, I don't have a problem with dating either even though I'm double incontinent. Of course, once majority of girls learn about my issues, they won't be happy to commit to long-term relationship and I'm rather trying to be straightforward about my issues. But, thing is, that I'm not looking for a girl that will dump me once she learns, that I'm in diaper or whatever. I have a supportive wife and I'm not cheating on her, I'm talking mostly about experiences in my late twenties, yet when I was still younger and a bit wild I managed to get my balls deep down them and only afterwards they were really asking questions, then they didn't want to continue this relationship with me because they have considered me to be handicapped probably.
Re: successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Fri Jun 08, 2018 9:44 pm
What my family and I had laughed off as a quirky bladder for years was diagnosed as urge incontinence in 1987, I had been married to my first wife for three years. She tolerated my condition but never truly accepted it. Although her support was inconsistent and minimal at best, I don't blame her for her feelings, which in fact were shared by me for a number of years. Ironically, our attitudes were tempered by our daughter, born in 1988, who was far more understanding of my incontinence and diapers once she learned of them. Incontinence didn't kill out marriage, but it certainly didn't help.
I married again in 2006, and the circumstances couldn't have been more different. My second wife was in her late forties when we met, had a baby girl and like many women in her situation had her own experience with incontinence, and she was not at all put off by my circumstances. Both she and two older sisters had stress and mild urge incontinence, so I believe that she was predisposed to tolerance. That plus maturity and a naturally relaxed comportment made her not only an ideal mate, but also an invaluable member of my support team. In fact, I never truly accepted or was even remotely comfortable with my incontinence and need to wear diapers until meeting my second wife. We've had a normal, healthy marriage for over twelve years, and her love, wisdom, patience and kindness have been transformation for me. I am forever grateful that she is in my life.
With all of that said, both significant others in my life during the past thirty-four years didn't reject me because of my incontinence. It wasn't always easy, but we prevailed over this. I'm not sure if my first wife would have married me with this problem, but she at least tolerated it during our marriage. My second wife was never bothered by my incontinence, and in fact has been more tolerant of it overall than I have. My sense is that emotionally mature women, especially as they age, are for more accepting of incontinence than are men. This may be increasingly rare as our society becomes more superficial than previous generations. My perspective is also of a man in relationships with women, so I can't honestly speak to what incontinent women are experiencing in their relationships.
I married again in 2006, and the circumstances couldn't have been more different. My second wife was in her late forties when we met, had a baby girl and like many women in her situation had her own experience with incontinence, and she was not at all put off by my circumstances. Both she and two older sisters had stress and mild urge incontinence, so I believe that she was predisposed to tolerance. That plus maturity and a naturally relaxed comportment made her not only an ideal mate, but also an invaluable member of my support team. In fact, I never truly accepted or was even remotely comfortable with my incontinence and need to wear diapers until meeting my second wife. We've had a normal, healthy marriage for over twelve years, and her love, wisdom, patience and kindness have been transformation for me. I am forever grateful that she is in my life.
With all of that said, both significant others in my life during the past thirty-four years didn't reject me because of my incontinence. It wasn't always easy, but we prevailed over this. I'm not sure if my first wife would have married me with this problem, but she at least tolerated it during our marriage. My second wife was never bothered by my incontinence, and in fact has been more tolerant of it overall than I have. My sense is that emotionally mature women, especially as they age, are for more accepting of incontinence than are men. This may be increasingly rare as our society becomes more superficial than previous generations. My perspective is also of a man in relationships with women, so I can't honestly speak to what incontinent women are experiencing in their relationships.
Re: successful(relatively) dating despite incontinence
Fri Aug 10, 2018 4:05 pm
Good luck on the dating scene, sociologygeek! Glad it has been relatively successful. I think if a girl really likes you, she can overlook the incontinence.
Schooner, since you have had urge incontinence since 1987, I'm curious to know just how it progressed for you over the years. I'd like to be prepared as I am urge incontinent and have OAB. I'm new to all of this. It just started about a month ago for me. Any insights into progression or tips on how to deal would be greatly appreciated. I've been doing a lot of research on incontinence studies to find possible treatments to prevent my condition from deteriorating further.
Schooner, since you have had urge incontinence since 1987, I'm curious to know just how it progressed for you over the years. I'd like to be prepared as I am urge incontinent and have OAB. I'm new to all of this. It just started about a month ago for me. Any insights into progression or tips on how to deal would be greatly appreciated. I've been doing a lot of research on incontinence studies to find possible treatments to prevent my condition from deteriorating further.