www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi Sandy!
The Tena Ultra diaper I wear does cost me 73 cents each which includes shipping. I'm on a home delivery plan and they are delivered to me every 6 weeks. I don't need to call them to re-order. They just show up every 6 weeks, and I send them a check. You can change the time between deliveries as you need. Some times I use more cloth diapers and don't use as many disposables. That's the only disposable I use. I occasionally use a pull-up on short periods when a full diaper isn't necceassary.
I've never tried any liners. During the day I will usually change about 3 times.The Tena Ultra does an excellent job holding it all. I've seen those Sam's disposables and they're really cheap. I'm afraid to buy them. I once asked another Forum if anyone had used them. Not much response. Do those have a plastic back?
You said you used three boosters in your diaper the other night. I assume you don't use that many with a better grade diaper. I'm a heavy wetter too. I don't have any control. That's why I like cloth diapers so much at night. A boostered up disposable just would not work for me. I guess that's why so many men use cloth diapers at night. Besides, I'm a side sleeper.
Do you ever wear plastic panties over your disposables at night? I some times have to wear plastic panties over my disposables during the day. Some of my disposables get a pin hole in the outer shell and leak. I really hate that when it happens!! Really embarrasing!!!
I wore those old green Depends too way back when. You couldn't hear them much at work, but when I came home, my wife heard me a mile away!!... ... ... Paul

Hi Paul
Yes I've had those pin hole leaks before. I had a case of the Molicare Supers a while back that leaked in the crotch area. I found out about it the hard way. I was out in a public place not sitting real lady like in a chair I had on a pair of light color jeans (If I'm going to have a leak it will be with light colored jeans) and I saw a few people pass by and they seem to be looking at my crotch. Well I didn't think that much of it. After all the jeans were a little baggie so I wasn't thinking I was showing anything off? Well about an hour later I went to change and found I had a wet spot about 4 inches long and about 1 1/2 inches wide in my crotch area (nice) Once in a great while I wear a pair of light jeans mostly for my husbands benefit he thinks I look hot in them. As far as your question about boosters No I don't generally use a booster in a High end diaper at night unless my fluid intake was really high that night. You side sleepers have it bad when it comes to leaks it seems. I sleep on my side also but I also sleep on my back and tummy a fair amount of the time also. I don't wear any plastic panties myself ever at night I do have a pad under the top sheet on the bed just in case. My husband bought me some lunjuray about 8 or ten years ago and he replaced the panties with plastic pants with white and pink ruffles. Where he ever got that stuff I don't know I was so mad! at him that we never talked about it again! I felt as if he were trying to treat me like a baby. And that was before we had a computer and I knew anything about the AB/DL crowd. Now that I look back at it he was just trying to be considerate he knew I had no use for the panties that came with the tops. (poor guy) Anyways I would recommend you try a booster during the day for the extra security when you know it maybe sometime before you can change again. You and I sound allot alike in our problems. I to have no control of my bladder at night and very little during the day. Most of the time during the day unless I'm near a restroom it's not worth the stress of trying to get there. My husband use to get on my case about it at times. But like I said to him it's not your problem. Does your wife ever give you problems? My husband has never known me with out protection. When we first met most of the time I only needed pads or belted undergarments during the day but I was wearing full protection at night. Paul you did ask about the Sam club's diapers yes they are the plastic back kind and yes they do make some noise. But for a cheap diaper there not that bad. There not as good as a waistband attends in my opinion. But if I can find some more of these on EBay I would buy them again. On another not wish me luck with my young friend we are suppose to go shopping later this week? She hasn't said whether she will go or not....................Sandy

OK Sandy
You've convinced me! There has been some times I could have used a booster pad in my diaper. You're going to have to tell me what to use. I haven't ever used them before, and let me know where I should buy them. The company I order my disposable diapers, HDIS, has some the reassure brand. I would have to buy a case of 200 for about $42.00, I really don't want to store that many, though. Are there smaller boxes?
When I first became incontinent many years ago, it was really hard on my wife. We had been married a long time before I started having accidents. She was concerned at first and was very patient with me. After several months and my wetting got worse, she just accepted the fact that I was going to be in diapers for a long time. She's OK with it now. I buy all my supplies and have my own closet for all my "stuff".
But she has been having a problem with an over active bladder lately. She's always going to the restroom. She's had no accidents, though. I've finally talked her into going to see her doctor.. They have medication for this, but she's heard of the side effects from the meds.
Don't be so tough on your husband for buying you those frilly plastic panties. I'm sure he meant well. It seems to help the person who suffers from incontinence when the couple works together in living with incontinence. My wife doesn't mind buying me lotions, powders, and diaper rash ointments. She even remarks when I wear a pair of plastic pants she likes. I really don't know how we would cope with the inconvenience of incontinece if it were not for our understanding spouse!
Good luck with your young friend and shopping. You will be able to give her a lot of good pointers she never even thought about. Let us know how it goes................Paul

Hi Paul
I hope this message will get posted. I've been trying to post since last week and have not been able to?
As far as boosters go I would just buy a single pack and try them out first and find out what ones work best for you. As I stated I like the Attend ones myself and also the Tranquility full length contour ones as they are called. You might just try the Depend boosters you can often find them at Wal Mart.
Sorry to here about your wife. I'm not one for doctors but it would be a good idea to have her checked out just to make sure it's nothing major. You may suggest she wears a pad like the Tena or Poise pad. There not much differant from a heavy flow Maxi. Even if she hasn't had any leaks it would be good for her piece of mind if she does. Or at least recommend she wears one when she's away from home. A leak away from home could be a disaster for her. But just to warn you if she does use a pad make sure it's one for urine the regular Maxi's don't work very well.
I have more to say but I need to be somewhere. By for now....Sandy

Hi Sandy
I was wondering why you took so long to reply to my post. Thanks for your suggestions on the booster. I'll try the depend boost pads since I have seen them at Wal-Mart. My wife saw her regular doctor and she's on Detrol LA. It's a little early yet, but she's seeing a little help. I think it takes up to two weeks to get the full benefit of the drug. If it doesn't help, she'll probably see my urologist. She had a zoo trip with her kindergarten class yesterday, but I don't know how it went since she came down with a case of laryngitis. She ended up staying home today. I'll keep you up to date on the booster pad and her OAB.
Thanks again for all your suggestions, Sandy...............Paul

Hi Paul
My friend turned me down for the shopping trip Still not up to it yet but I'll keep working at it. As far as your wife goes I would recommend a urologist regardless they are the ones that are suppose to know about bladder issues. If the Detrol works without to many side effects that would be great. I haven't heard many good reports about that stuff. But it must work for some or it wouldn't be selling. I've tried a few drugs years ago but soon found that with all the side effects maybe wearing a diaper isn't so bad after all. I'm in good health everywhere else it's just my bladder that doesn't work. You talked about your wife and helping you by buying stuff for you and being supportive that is a real blessing to have a spouse that supports you. I would be lost with out my spouse. He has never known me without diapers. He seems to think of my diapers as nothing more the underwear most of the time. He use to give me a hard time once in awhile if he new I was being lazy years ago when I had more control. Has your wife ever given you a hard time about that? But like I use to tell him it's not like you have to change me and most of the time it's not like I was dry anyway. I also would get in trouble sometimes if I was to buy cheap diapers and would have to change more often. He would see my diaper pail filling up faster then normal or just see me change more often. He didn't seem to understand that not all are the same I think he understand now. I remember when we were first married I was so self conscious about the smell like when you wake up in the morning I know he didn't appreciate that smell. But he claims he so use to it now after all these years that he really dosen't notice it most of the time. I must get going all for now.............Sandy

Hey Sandy,
My wife finished up a week on the Detrol. She's been taking other medication for a bad cold she has right now. She's not sure how it's helping yet since she has been taking in lots of water. I say give it another week or two before she can really tell. If she does have little help, I'll send her to my urologist for a look see.
My wife only gets a little irraitated when I have to carry around a spare diaper for a change when we are out for a long while. In cold weather, I can tuck the diaper in my jacket pocket. In the summer, though, I have a problem. My wife's purse is not big enough to hold it for me. I just have to be creative sometimes.
You mentioned the problem of the odor you have in the morning when you're in the night's wet diaper. I had the same problem. My wife always could smell it. It was a real problem. But when I changed to cloth diapers, they do not put out an odor like the disposable does. Even when I wore plastic pants over the disposable, the smell still came out. Cloth diapers do not have that kind of odor. My wife never smells anything anymore. Sorry, another plug for cloth diapers, but it's true. You really ought to consider trying them some time.
Keep after you young friend. She'll go shopping with you sooner or later.
Take care!!...............Paul

Hi Paul
If it wasn't for the laundry I think I would start using them after what you said about them. But I'm so use to just un taping throw it in the trash and for getting about it that it's hard to want to go to something that needs to be washed. I've never been one for a purse myself but they do come in handy for carrying incontinence supplies. I'm the type that just carries a wallet in my back pocket most of the time. I know what your thinking kind of red necky isn't it. But then I do live about a 1/2 hour out in the boonies from any sizable towns. I always keep a few diapers stashed in the vehicle's just in case. Often if I'm going some where that I'll be away from my car or will be walking somewhere I wear a small back pack. Those darn purses are always in the way and slipping off your shoulder I was going to ask you about the plastic pants holding the smell in. But you answered that question for me. I have found that there are a few disposables that do contain the smell rather well like the Tranquility ATN's seem to work ok for that. Can't say much for the Molicares and the Abri forms on odor control.........Well I must get going all for now.......Sandy

Well my young friend and I finally went on our shopping trip. She seems to be handling it fairly well now. I gave her a booster pad to wear with her brief. She was a little concerned about the extra bulk But after I assured her that she wasn't showing she went with it. We went to several stores and found some great outfits. She still seem to be drawn to the tighter fitting stuff. But I showed her how she can look more sophisticated mature and/or professional. And still be somewhat sexy without reveling anything. To be honest no matter what she wears she looks great. (wish I had that problem) She did call me later and ask about the booster pads as to wear she could get some of them she told me she never would have made it without changing if it wasn't for the booster. She stated that gave her some extra piece of mind. I said yep that's why I use them. We are planning to get together again soon and do something??
.......All for now...Sandy

Sandy,
Looks like your continuing to help out this young lady. I'll bet she's not ready to go to loose fitting clothes to help hide here diaper. I know this is so much more of a challege for a woman. Men, like myself, don't have the problem except a few special events. I go bike riding, and the tighter bike shorts do really give me away as I a diaper wearer. The tight shorts really do a pretty good job compressing the diaper. Just a little plastic rustle, though.
As for the booster pads, I found it a great help when my wife and I were on an extended trip or outing. I'm about to fly out this weekend and they'll be a help there too. At least we'll have a layover so I can go to the rest room to change. My wife is helpfull there. She'll usually keep my change in her carry on bag.
Good luck with your future outings with your new young friend. ......Paul