www.incontinentsupport.org

Hey all,

I still have the occasioal debate with myself whether to give the biofeedback and pt a second try to see how long I can get dry, or if i get dry.. and then I always come back to the same conclusion..no, I don't think I could commit reliably to doing hte excercises every day, and that is really what it would take to be effective in the long term. It's not that i would be too busy to do them, becuause i would have ample time, it's that after 31 years..will be 32 this coming friday ...I should know myself by now. I make commitments to clean up, brush my teeth, keep my apartment clean..and I do ok for a while, but then i relapse. I'm always distracted by something.. ususally its my computer.. but sometimes it's my TV or its a book.. or something I get distracted with..and things go undone. I have tried to break that habit.. but after 31 years its still there. Which is why I say it very well may be not realistic for me to keep up wtih the excercises..

But, heres the thing about treatments.. yes, if you do X Y and Z, you might be dry..but, that doesn;t mean your NOT incontinent, it jsut means you found another way to deal with it and manage it other than diapers. Because the fact is, unless the underlying cause is temporary, such as weak muscles.. which actually may not be temporary, such as in the case of post childbirth incontienence (I have heard cases where it was permanent), the treatment has to be kept up with life long.. but you never really go back to being normal.. So in that case, it seems clear to me that doing X Y and Z is only worth it if it doesnt cause more mental stress and angst than just using diapers. And for me right now, that's not the case. I discovered today that if i really concentrate and squeeze the muscles.. i can stop the flow.. but it requires me thinking about my bladder.. and concsiously remembering what to do. Same thing with the excercises.. i have to conciously stop what im doing to accomodate my bladder. No matter how you slice it, whether or not your pants are dry, whether or not you wear a diaper, your bladder doesn't accomodate you, you accomodate IT!! Well, ladies and gentlemen, I for one refuse to live my life dictated by what my bladder wants. Id rather just pad up with Abena, and not have any worries at all other than worriying whether its going to leak or not.. which it usually doesnt. These days, when im working at walmart or substiut teaching...which by the way, tonight is my last night for FOREVER!..i just pad up and let it go..and dont even worry about peeing in the toilet. Ever since i decided to do that, the work night has become MUCH less stressful.


Peace out!

_________________
"We cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love" Mother Teresa

"THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS!" - Captain Picard from Chain of Command, Part II

Rob, I do Kegel exercises and agree that they can be just another chore that takes time out of our day. For me, they are worth it as they markedly improve my sphincter control. However, don't forget that once you have reached your basic level with the Kegel exercises and are just doing daily maintenance, they can be performed rather informally. For example, I often do Kegels while standing in line, sitting at my desk, watching TV, or while just walking around.

--John

JD,

Oh yeah, I don't deny that there is value to doing kegels, and im not saying its not worth for some to do. I'm not even saying its not worth for me to do them, because ive been doing them lately and i have regained a small measure of control. What I don't think is a good thing though is to think that just because you get to a certian level where you are farily dry, you can go ahead and stop wearing protection. Because it's possible that you may get to a point of perfect control, and then something throws a wrench into the works... which is what happened to me.. That something could be constipation, kidney stones, mental stress, etc... I guess what I'm trying to say is that I have realized that while treatments help, they may not necessarily eliminate the need for protection in the long run. I don't think that you'd ever get to a point where you are so good with your control that you can go without a diaper. I mean that would be nice, but since you have nerve damage, there will always be a need to have that back up. But, it is nice to have the option of doing excercises and reducing the amount of episodes that do happen to keep skin breakdown at bay. That way, living with diapers becomes more bearable than it would be if there was progressive loss of control down to complete..

Peace out!

Rob

_________________
"We cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love" Mother Teresa

"THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS!" - Captain Picard from Chain of Command, Part II