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 Post subject: Truce
PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2015 8:28 pm 
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The bed wars in my household appear to have ended - for the moment, at least. I've been successful at containing and concealing my night wettings and the bed has been dry. For the last several weeks, The Hubbs has been treating me with more civility and consideration. Out of sight (and tactile sensation), out of mind, I guess.

Wetters


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2015 12:54 am 
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It's awful that respect is based on the illusion of continence.


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2015 11:15 am 
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In an effort to be as discreet as possible, I've stopped using my surface bed pads. I haven't needed them since I switched to Abri-Flex pull-ups, but I'm apprehensive. I've grown somewhat emotionally attached to the bed pads, and for that reason as well, it's good for me to break away.

Wetters


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2015 6:22 pm 
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Joined: Sun Jun 23, 2013 10:22 pm
Posts: 497
Location: Western North Carolina
Wetters,

Try putting the bed pads under the sheet. This way it will still protect the bed from getting stained. Also out of sight, out of mind.


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2015 7:07 pm 
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Joined: Sun Oct 20, 2013 3:45 pm
Posts: 1943
Location: North Carolina - Raleigh area
Pardon my commenting in the ladies' forum, but, like Rope, I put my pads under the sheet. It just looks more like normal living.

I am a side-sleeper and we all know that disposables often leak from the side. Therefore I go to bed with a cloth diaper on top of the disposable. That combination does not leak - but I keep the pads under the sheet just in case. More peace of mind for myself and for my wife. :)

--John


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Fri May 29, 2015 2:17 am 
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Thanks, Guys. We have a couple of waterproof mattress covers, and my husband gets annoyed when the sheet gets wet. Also, I don't like to disturb his sleep or to strip/clean/make a bed in the middle of the night. I "invented" (think Al Gore) surface bed pads in 1999 when I had an epiphany during a middle-of-the-night bed stripping. I worked out the dimensions and construction, then got a catalog in the mail the next day that had just what I was looking for.

Wetters


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Fri May 29, 2015 2:23 pm 
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I keep a mattress cover below the sheets, and in the unlikely event my diaper leaks, I grab an old towel from the linen closet, throw it over the wet spot, and go back to sleep. This given me the most normal sleeping arrangement most nights, and the least disruption to me wife, as I can deal with the sheets in the morning.


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Sat May 30, 2015 5:19 am 
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Posts: 410
Wetters, There comes a time when we have to "bite the bullet" and stop playing around with our incontinence. Too many of us, me included, started off trying to get away with the minimum of protection. The idea that a smaller diaper somehow makes it less of a diaper seems to make one feel better about wearing protection. But the word protection is the key. Less is NOT going to make us feel better because it is not going to work. But we have all played that game. If a dry and warm bed makes you and your husband find that 'truce' then always have a dry bed. There are diapers that will do that for you. I can not really remember the last time my bed got wet. Oh a few light wet lines from leaking around the leg openings has happened but they dry up in a short time and they happen after I have come back to bed to have coffee with my wife and I am sitting up which puts pressure on my diapers. I, years ago, just pushed "pride" aside and went for dealing with this situation realistically. I wear two night weight cloth diapers, one will usually work, but two ALWAYS works. Think of it this way. If you are going out in a heavy rain - what works better - a small umbrella or a large umbrella? The small one is easy to handle and carry but the large one keeps you dry. Stop playing around with this and find the protection / diapers that will, at a minimum, keep that truce lasting forever so you can deal with all the other things life throws at you. Papa


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Sat May 30, 2015 8:08 am 
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Joined: Sun Jun 23, 2013 10:22 pm
Posts: 497
Location: Western North Carolina
Well said Papa.


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 Post subject: Re: Truce
PostPosted: Sat May 30, 2015 9:31 am 
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Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 8:08 pm
Posts: 480
Location: York, Maine
I'm sorry you can't feel accepted by your husband, Wetters.....I know the feeling all too well. Having problems with ones bladder is hard to accept. It makes daily living extremely hard and places a lot of limitations on life. Having a partner that isn't 110% supportive is worse than wearing diapers, leaking, and being wet. My heart goes out to you......I hope you're otherwise well......


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