www.incontinentsupport.org

Doctor and my Urologist never once mentioned how to deal with the obvious problems of being incontinent. I was refered to the continence nurse. She was brilliant. I can't praise her enough.

My Dr & I talk about it a little each time I go in. Even more now that he put me on Invokana for diabetic control. Either way he's good with how I choose to manage myself. He checks my skin to make sure there are no sores but beyond that it's a non-subject. He did say once he wished other patients he has would be better emotionally in how they handle things and tells them (without naming names) how I do it. He said he has even needed to prescribe Xanax for a period of time to reduce the panic attacks some get over it. Pretty sad....

Someone else has said that "our doctors are the best qualified to diagnose and treat our ailments, but not to tell us how to live with them."

In that regard nurses seem to do a better job. Other incontinents do the best job but, when we are new to incontinence ourselves, we usually do not know other people who are incontinent (at least we do not know that they are).

--John

If this seems just a little off-topic, please forgive me.

I just returned from the annual wellness exam that my health insurer insists upon. Although I'm losing weight, it isn't enough to cause anxiety. My family doctor said that I was managing my medical issues far better than anyone could expect, and that I should be proud of how well I function in public. She asked me for the names and addresses of my diaper suppliers, which she wrote down, for her other incontinent patients, she said. I got two shots, orders for some routine blood work and came home. As you might guess, I am elated. Incontinence can have its victories; accidents will happen. However, we can have our victories too, and they can be sweet indeed.

I had an experience a few months ago. I needed to find a new Urologist and made an appointment with one who had a good reputation. When I arrived, I was told I would be meeting with the other Urologist in the office (the one who has a horrible reputation and I had expressly asked not to see). When he began his examination, it went like this...

Doctor: What brings you in to the office today?
Me: Urge Incontinence. Had it for a while now.
Doctor: Okay, drop your pants, lets get a look at things.
Me: *drops pants*
Doctor: *sees diaper* Why are you wearing THAT??? (insert accusatory tone here)
Me: Urge Incontinence. Had it for a while now.
Doctor: But why are you wearing THAT??
Me: *pulls up pants. leaves office* still looking for new Urologist.

Ugh.

CJ

How awful. I am so sorry. Out of embarrassment, I never wear protection when I meet with doctors. Today I had a physical exam that involved a urine sample. I arrived in normal underwear more than 30 minutes in advance of the appointment, which I had deliberately scheduled for early in the morning, when things were likely to begin punctually. I told the receptionist that "now would be a good time" for the urine sample; however, I was kept waiting, in progressive discomfort, for almost an hour. I am at the beginning of my medical Odyssey with respect to incontinence. I have dribbling after I urinate, and also heightened frequency and urgency. I am 38, and today I had my first "digital rectal exam." My GP has referred me to a urologist because I have an enlarged prostate (on a scale of 1 to 10, "somewhere in the middle"). I am a brother in a Roman Catholic intentional community and this type of examination is very invasive and difficult for me. Thanks be to God, I got through it.

CJ,

Reading your account of your visit to that (expletive deleted) urologist was an eye-opener. Urologists, of all physicians, should understand what we must do to manage. When they don't, when their response mimics the behavior of ignorant laymen, we have every right to be angry. I look forward to reading that you have found a competent urologist who understands your issues. Good luck.

That Urologist was TOTALLY out of line with that comment... It may be rarer to see someone younger that he may thing would not use a diaper to manage urge issues (like myself also) but no had no right to say what he did. I would have reported him that day! My first doc 30 years ago did the same thing, made a comment in regards to night wetting, it shut me down talking to anyone after that for over 15 years, I just managed myself... sad indeed!

_________________
Puffy
BC, Canada
Fighting the "Bladder Battle" since 1995

That was a BAD doctor.
But even though they graduated at the BOTTOM of their class, they are still called DOCTOR.

Maybe they should call them JERKS instead of doctors.

I had a doctor like that, I told him if he ever touched my private parts again he would be peeing out of his ass.
Then I walked out and demanded a new doctor.

Schoppy

PS: I did get a new one and they was real good.

Schoppy, Puffy, Patrick and Noe,

Thanks for your support. I think it can be hard to fire doctors, even when they say or do something outrageous like this. But it was so obvious my only choice seemed to be to leave or do something which would have gotten me arrested. In hindsight, I should have said, "Oh, silly me. What was I thinking?!" , then pulled off my diaper and peed on him. "Oh yes, I'm incontinent. That's why I was wearing a diaper. Silly me". Then leave.

Hindsight is wonderful.

CJ