www.incontinentsupport.org

Sorry, didn't wanted to sound like a grumpy old man, I find it annoying that I have to wear diapers, but they do provide me freedom / liberty from freaking out about my bladder. I still freak out about it sometimes, but ever since I learned the hard way what to do, I kinda relaxed more about it. Accepting it hmm. that might be harder.....only time can tell.

Anyway I truly appreciate you guys in here, despite dealing with such issues, you maintain a positive attitude and are all willing to help.
This is something us newbies like me truly appreciate.

Well I have had a very long road over the last year or so involving my urinary issues, pelvic issues, back pain, various neurological symptoms, anxiety, panic attacks, and PTSD
to the point where my bowels were going hysterical(developed temporary IBS). I was rather frustrated at dealing with lousy doctors who were either
incompetent, inept, lacking professional mannerisms or otherwise couldn't provide any answers

I do recall a couple of turning points last year. My sense of self pride got shattered several times- first when I had to be cathed in the ER cause
I couldn't pee, then again when I had to undergo a rather painful "urodynamics test". And then after most of my pains and stuff seemed to calm down
and I was finally able to return to work, suddenly my anxiety levels & panic attacks start spinning out of control- It got so bad I end up dribbling & leakin right in the middle of the office.....
At the time I bit my lip and began using diapers. I was really overwhelmed by this terrible fear- and almost unfounded anger. I really felt scared about everything
and wanted to do whatever I could to avoid any and all car accidents. I began feeling so scared at times that I could not even walk in a parking lot- my legs would just tremble
and I would just sort of dribble or leak into my nappy. I used a couple of comfort objects and borrowed a plushie from my sister to help me through.
Many times I felt so depressed and almost suicidal- contemplating various methods of killing myself. During some of the worst bouts I would cuddle my teddy bear and then just stay in bed repeating the entire car accident scenario over and over in my mind - wondering about whole bunch of "What ifs". I regretted many of my decisions and almost regressing a little- wishing I could go back in time and avoid all this mayhem. This seemed to make my anxiety and frustration worse in some ways- i cried myself to sleep. My Psych therapist though was able to help me through sorting my feelings and emotions and kinda come to terms with myself. My therapists have suggested to do some mindfulness training- being mindful and not 'critical/judgmental' of your surroundings. And as I did that, I began to notice things calm down some. I slowly noticed the feeling of comfort and security replace my feelings of tension, pain and frustration. I tried to think of the benefits of diapers and what I have gone through. Some of the things I found was that I was still able to enjoy life- although now ill have to be a bit padded.
I can at least sit through entire movie(s) without having to run/hobble/crawl to the restroom like I had to last year. I don't have to worry much about finding restrooms on the road. After all I've been through, I feel I am better able to accept a lot more of what life has to throw or offer me. And I can better be able to tolerate and be in tune with other people's quirks

So I guess diapers have been a key to this new found perspective and stage in life....

They offer a peace of mind, so that way they have had a positive impact, but they are expensive and harm the planet, so I feeel responsible and guilty for this Blue Marble we live on, although I am a very modest consumer of any products, incontinence or otherwise, and have quit meat, don't drive etc..

As my need for protection is periodical I doubt I'll get any diapers free by doctor's orders, but I'll try that out. I've been thinking about starting to wear cloth, but they are probably not discreet enough. A bit off-topic answer, maybe, but for me wearing has been a mixed experience.

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Linja-autojen ja rakkauden perässä voi juosta tai odottaa seuraavaa.

The above post isn't mine,

I can consider them as positive. The issue is growing progressively and knowing that I am well protected and that my family supports and understands me is a great solution.

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I am newly IC (Urge + OAB) but that doesn't bother me, even as I speak in public. All is about confidence!
Would like to encourage you in your journey of IC.

No, I have never considered them as something positive and I don't do so even now. I hate being incontinent. I really do hate it from the bottom of my heart and I can't help my feelings, even though I developed a certain mindset that allows me to go through life without worrying that much about those issues as I have found more important things in life to pursue, I still hate it. Of course, time flies pretty fast and I have gotten used to wearing diapers, actually I would feel bad if I took them - of course I can't due to obvious reasons, but I still hate them and If I could pay 1,000,000$ to reverse my incontinence I would do it. Not that I have this kind of cash, but if I could I would spend every single penny to get rid of this. This is how it really is bothering me, but I tend to not show my real feelings and I try not to think about, how would my life be "if"... or Why is it "me"... No point, I learned to accept the facts, but it doesn't matter that I started to like my issues in any way.

Imagine your life as an incontinent person without diapers or “protection” (protection from the humiliation of voiding all over yourself) of some kind….
I can live a pretty normal life with diapers and thank God that I have the means to afford them! I know that’s difficult for some, but a necessary part of their lives.

It's been about a year for me since I was "unsullied". Now as a "sullied" (IC) person, I have mostly accepted my incontinence. But I still have difficulty discussing it with my better half or family when it comes up, which isn't often. Except for one daughter, the conversation always feels awkward. My wife doesn't like me using the word "diaper" either. I can live with that but I am used to calling it like it is.

As far as "protection" goes, I feel I have worked out something that works for me at this stage. It has taken considerable time and experimentation to get the best price/protection/comfort. Pull-ups by day and a brief for night, and extra absorbent pull-ups for shopping/errands. I liked cloth diapers at night for comfort but my schedule does not work well for the laundry side of things. Wow, how fast this year has gone by!

I never used to have a night wetting problem but every once in a while I fail now. I know now that if I pee in a dream, I now pee in a parallel universe. So how do you protect against an occasional event? Unless you want to change bedding you diaper up. On the plus side of that, I now don't have to get up in the night. Why damage the brief tapes and go back to bed wide awake? So though I arrive at the morning sullied, I get a good night's sleep. That is a very positive thing in my book.

Another perk is that on cold winter days that we're starting to experience now, the pull-up keeps my behind warmer. It's amazing how much that helps.

I have one more thing left to conquer for next spring: telling my tax-lady about my diaper deductions for 2021.

(For those that are unfamiliar with the Game of Thrones series, the "unsullied" referred to an army of elite warrior-eunuchs. I've borrowed the reference for IC).

Wayne - fellow "sullied" person, I like your sense of humor.

You have company in all you mentioned, including the "pee dreams" and now getting a better night's sleep due to wearing diapers and not having to get up (more than once for me).

Re nomenclature, that also is shared. Often we can determine the approximate level of acceptance by the preferred terminology. A diaper is a diaper is a diaper. My wife had difficulty accepting that word.

--John
(double incontinent)