www.incontinentsupport.org

well, I have been dribbling and "leaking" after I urinate for some time now....its never been much of an issue. I've worn pads or guards before and they work ok but they bunch up and aren't super comfortable.....Within the last few months I began to develop urinary frequency. I was going to the bathroom 12-18 times per 24 hour period and leaking in my underwear every time. I even went a week without a restful nights sleep because I was up all night peeing every hour and couldn't get back to sleep. Sometimes I leak a little and sometimes a lot. It varied between quarter size and baseball/softball size leaks. so I have been wearing diapers, and protective underwear (pull-ups) for a couple months now 24/7 even to work. I can't really get away with a full diaper so usually a pull-up is all I can wear, its most often times enough to keep me dry. When I am home I usually just wear a full regular adult diaper. I've been to the urologist and had the cystoscopy and he's checked my uroflowmetry and my PVR (post void residual) Mostly normal.....He gave me Vesicare for what he thinks is overactive bladder. I have no problem holding urine or making it to the toilet on time, just after I go, I leak and leak.......I didn't care much for the urologist right from the start, I am looking to begin anew with somebody different. I am still having some frequency with the meds, but it has slowed down and is manageable. I am still having accidents every time I use the bathroom. I have gone out with boxer briefs on twice in the last week to do yard work and was ok until the first time I had to pee, at which time I completely soaked the front of them. So I can either continue wearing them and be wet or wear protection. My wife is ok with it. She hasn't said much about it, except for a wisecrack about how one of my diapers fit me one time.....I didn't really care for that....She has been mostly supportive, though and has gone to the urologist with me and even carried a spare diaper in her purse for me. So for now, I don't know where to turn, I have the doctor who I don't care for, a condition that I am not exactly sure I have, and more questions than answers. The diapers are a godsend and are making things tolerable.......I don't dare go far without one on.......It would appear as though I am in good company here.....so this is my story

PB&J,

You are not having an easy time of things. I cannot advise regarding your medical concerns, but I have written a 23-page white paper "Introduction to wearing adult diapers - their selection and wear." I began it for a friend whose father was recently incontinent and having a hard time with diapers.

You may not need the paper, but, if you do, send me a personal message with your email address and I will email you a copy. Others have found it to be helpful and my pelvic health therapist has been distributing copies to her clients. If you are uncomfortable sending me your email address we will work something else out.

Regards,

--John

Hey there PB&J and again welcome to the forums. I can relate to most of your story, from the dribbling and wet spots(which I always called "spotting") to the drugs they throw at you with the crappy side effects. My advice to you would be try to find another doctor as soon as you can. Diapers can be a great tool but it can also lead some to just "deal" with the main problem. There are a host of other test that you have not mentioned and urge you to look into some of these. Again, I know what you are going through but don't give up yet. I was on VesiCare for a while too and I too had to give it up mainly because of the side effects but also it became more and more ineffective over time.
Keep us posted on how things are going and feel free to use the search feature to look for any thing you need. If you can't find what you need there, I am sure several members here will help out any way they can.

Rope

Thanks for the support, guys....I have been trying to go without protection for the weekend....I did moderately ok and only had a couple of accidents yesterday and then today, it was accident after accident and the OAB seemed to be kicking up despite the Vesicare trying to do its thing....finally this afternoon, I went back into a Depend for Men pull up....I said to the wife...I am just kidding myself trying to go without wearing a diaper.....trying to push the limits......I don't know why I torture myself.....It was hot up here in Maine today for Mother's day. It was in the high seventies/low eighties.....it was almost too hot to wear a diaper.....I tried to do without.....None of the accidents were particularly large...Though they were bigger than a silver dollar every time....just enough to make you uncomfortable....I HATE being wet down there......Hope you all had a great Mother's day.....

Sounds sort of failure. The dripping and spotting are difficult to deal with mentally. (For me anyway.) Sometimes I think I have reached the point where I can deal with it. The "This is how I am.". Other times I am not so sure about things.
Do let us know how things go at the doctor for you.

Scott

Thanks Scott, This has been a rough week. It seems as though the Vesicare stopped working abruptly....for the last few days I have been averaging 14-16 times per day, with small leaks/accidents each time I go. I don't go without protection of some sort because its just a bad idea. A pad or pull-up is usually sufficient. When I am home though, I usually prefer the more robust protection afforded by a regular diaper. I like to be over protected. I do wear pull-ups and/or pads to work because a regular diaper is harder to conceal. I am in between urologists right now and its going to be another 2 weeks until I see the new one so...I am kind of stuck......We have a big family wedding coming up the weekend after memorial day, its a 3 hour car ride away....I am worried about making the trip when I am peeing 1-2 times per hour.......

Hi PB&J32, welcome aboard! Sorry to hear of your issues, but you are among like-minded people here who can relate to having to deal with it all. Sounds like an external catheter system could really work for you for the upcoming wedding trip, but it does take some time to figure out everything and what works for one, may not for another. Lots of info out there on it if you want to inquire, I use it whenever I travel, and works great for me. Any questions, feel free to ask here or PM me! Puffy

_________________
Puffy
BC, Canada
Fighting the "Bladder Battle" since 1995

Not sure how the external cath would work..... I can still hold it until I get it the bathroom with no problems, just after I go I leak and leak......furthermore, I can't empty sitting down. I have to stand up to fully empty my bladder. I don't know how that thing would work like that sitting in a car for 3 hours.....it's weird, I have control over when I go it's just after I go is when I have the problems.....

Hi PB&J32: Sorry to hear about the rough week. I too started in a similar fashion; the ups and downs were quite unnerving. Thankfully, there are ways to deal with these curves that we get dealt with. So hang in there! And this forum is a wealth of knowledge and support. The members and postings here have truly helped me beyond imagination. Keep us posted.

Thanks All...I was talking to the wife last night about this....she was like..."oh wow...I didn't realize the medication wasn't working at all!!!" I was like...."have we been living in the same house for the last week or so???" she said she realized that the frequency was back up to what it was before the meds......I am back up at night now....so it would appear that the medication is having no effect at all.....As for the accidents, they are small but happen with every trip to the bathroom and while upsetting, at least that's consistent.....I am feeling ignored.....and alone.....